Mario Monday: it's cake!

View fullsize

Cake by Mermaids Bakery. Photo provided to Cake Wrecks by Tess F.

It's Mario Monday!

Last Monday (Jan. 27) was also National Chocolate Cake Day, but I had another Mario item I wanted to post, so I let the holiday slip by unobserved.. However, I couldn't stop thinking about Mario cakes, when I remembered Cake Wrecks, a website the kids and I used to LOVE looking at.

Mostly they post professionally made cakes that are disasters for one reason or another, but every Sunday they showcase the "Sweets," cakes that truly show the artistry among the best of the best in the cake world. Here's the first Sunday Sweets post that pops up when you search their site for Mario, but there are a lot of others, as well as the daily wrecks. Especially if you've got some time to browse and laugh, check it out!

#MarioMonday! If you don't know about the #CakeWrecks website, you owe it to yourself to look first at these gorgeous #Mario cakes, and then scroll through their daily wreckiness: "when professional cakes go horribly, hilariously wrong." https://t.co/YcUnPWuwPX

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) February 3, 2020

simple, senses-focused self care

View fullsize

I appreciate the simplicity of this senses-focused self-care illustration from Gemma Correll (Instagram: @gemmacorrell).
💙
It relates perfectly to one of the suggested exercises from Heather Stang’s Mindfulness & Grief book. In the week 1 chapter, Mindful Awareness, there’s a meditation called Coming to Your Six Senses. (Thinking is the sixth.) You methodically scan through your senses, simply noticing what you notice. It works as a stand-alone exercise, she explains, or informally as you go about your day.
💛
I found a similar guided meditation, called Embodying the Senses, from Erik Vienneau on the Insight Timer app. I like that it’s an easy concept to practice, just taking time to notice your senses, and doesn’t involve having to remember or do anything complicated.
❤️
💙
💛
#mindfulnessandgrief #sensesmeditation #fivesenses #gemmacorrell #selfcare #mindfulawareness #insighttimer #erikvienneau

book club: building a life worth living

Book club has begun! Prompts for discussing ch. 1 are posted to this thread at @NowMattersNow. Do you know about #DBT? I didn’t. @DrLinehan’s memoir starts with the basics —learn as you go— along with her compelling personal story that makes it all very real. #suicideprevention https://t.co/3eZRcB1MdA

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) February 1, 2020

mariachi entertainment system brings the joy

Here's a great pick-me-up for what — at least where I am — is a gloomy, wintry day. Thanks to @MariachiMES (they make #mariachi #videogamemusic)! Looking forward to some #SuperMario covers. #aha #takeonme https://t.co/OPNClX62CE via @LaughingSquid

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 31, 2020

get comfortable feeling uncomfortable

This illustration by @lisacongdon gives me something great to contemplate. I’m working on #mindfulness so I can learn to sit with the uncomfortable feelings of #grief and #loss, to experience them, not push them away. As #RobertFrost said, “The best way out is always through.” pic.twitter.com/JUo3MrR2LT

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 30, 2020

This morning before yoga class, as I was considering what to post today, I saw this illustration in my saved posts on Instagram and realized it was perfect. I knew I had some things to say about it, so I decided to wait until after class when I would have time to get my thoughts together.
❤️
I’ve been back to hot yoga the past four weeks, Fridays, but tomorrow I’m on the schedule to teach my indoor rowing class. Since I have been consistent with hot yoga so far in 2020, I didn’t want to miss a week just because of the time conflict, so I decided to go today instead.
💙
I got to The Yatra Center, knowing there would be a different instructor on Thursday than on Fridays. Sometimes it’s good to shake things up, right? Marsha came in and began to prepare us for class, and casually welcomed us to “power vinyasa.” Vinyasa is a flow of movement between poses in yoga, in coordination with the breath. Already pretty tough. In a hot room. Then add “power.”
💛
For a moment I questioned, what have I gotten myself into? And then I remembered this illustration and exhortation from Lisa Congdon: Get comfortable feeling uncomfortable. And I knew (as tends to happen in yoga class) that I was in the right place at the right time with the right teacher. Marsha’s class was hard! But it was not too hard for me. It was uncomfortable! But I stayed with it. Her message throughout class was that without the dark, there’s no such thing as light. We can’t appreciate peace until we’ve come through chaos. And sometimes it takes death for us to see how short life is, and to really live it.
🧘🏻‍♀️
One of the reasons I’m working to grow in my mindfulness right now is to learn to sit with the uncomfortable feelings of grief and loss, to experience them, not push them away. Because they can’t be held off forever. Robert Frost said, “The best way out is always through.” So get comfortable feeling uncomfortable.
❤️
💙
💛
#getcomfortablefeelinguncomfortable #hotyoga #yatracenter #yogalessons #powervinyasa #grief #loveandloss #mentalhealth #strongwomen #shakethingsup #bestwayoutisthrough #robertfrost #lisacongdon

a deep look at the psychology of friendship

A fascinating read — I was excited to see that author @LydiaDenworth has just published a book on the subject! Whether you have a current or recent middle schooler or just remember *being* a middle schooler, this piece will resonate with you. #mentalhealth #friendship #parenting https://t.co/gJDzdYqq9c

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 29, 2020

don't be afraid to be awkward

From Megan Devine of @refugeingrief: Looking to help a #grieving friend? Don’t be afraid to feel awkward. Grieving people would much rather have you stumble through your love and support than confidently assert that things are not as bad as they seem. #griefsupport #howtohelp pic.twitter.com/g4EbEGnUzD

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 28, 2020

Author Megan Devine of Refuge In Grief says:

Looking for ways to help a grieving friend? Don't be afraid to feel awkward. It's OK if you don't know what to say or do. Here's the thing: There's no magic incantation, no magic code, no special string of words that can make things right for your friend.

You can’t do it right because there is no “right.” I hope that’s a relief. The thing is, it’s not your job to make your friend feel better, or even to take away their pain.

Feeling awkward is okay! In fact, feeling awkward is a great sign – it means you’re moving into new territory. Grieving people would much rather have you stumble through your love and support than confidently assert that things are not as bad as they seem.

The one thing to remember is to not try to fix what is unfixable. Your job as a support person is not to take away the person’s pain – that’s not possible. Your job is to companion them inside their pain. That distinction makes all the difference.

The trick is to lean into your helplessness in the face of your friend’s pain. Your job, honestly, is to feel awkward and stay there anyway. Just hang right out with their pain.

The answer to any kind of awkwardness is SKILL BUILDING. Bearing witness to someone’s pain without jumping in to fix it or make it better is a skill. And skills can be learned. Your friend needs you! Don't let feeling awkward stop you.
•
This is part of our guide to the "Care & Feeding of Your Grieving Person." Visit this link to see the entire comic:
https://www.refugeingrief.com/2018/…/09/help-a-friend-comic/

Mario Monday: animation vs. Super Mario Bros.

#MarioMonday! This fun animation from @alanthebecker is something I know Rader would have appreciated, and it would have inspired him to keep creating his own content. Take five to watch and enjoy! https://t.co/5xAKAc6NWD

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 27, 2020

Visit the Rader’s Games page to read about and find links to some of the games he created and published online. And click here (or follow the link from the tweet above) to view Alan Becker’s whole video.

new resource: center for parent and teen communication

Good news from the Center for @ParentAndTeen Communication about steps you can take now that support your student’s future #mentalhealth. You’ll find a lot more useful information on their Twitter feed and website. If you have a teen or college student, take a look. #parenting https://t.co/Yry06hRxT8

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 26, 2020

check it out: the parent project

One of my fellow warriors in the fight against suicide, Dianne Grossman of @MallorysArmy, has started a deep and moving video series — The Parent Project, Families in Crisis — on her YouTube channel. Take a minute to watch the trailer and subscribe. https://t.co/3WnKWqdzSm

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 25, 2020

enjoy national compliment day!

Seriously though, kind words can change someone’s day! A sincere compliment can shine a light into the darkness. You never know who needs to hear your words of encouragement. So be generous with them!
💚
I am not sure who will see this, but there’s something you’ve been working on, and you’re not sure anyone has noticed. I want to tell you: You’re doing a great job! Keep it up.
❤️
💙
💛

#ComplimentDay! Kind words can shine a light into the darkness. You never know who needs to hear your words of #encouragement, so speak generously. Thanks, @SandyBoynton! ❤️💙💛 #saysomethingnice #lookforthegood #shinealight #wordsofencouragement #kindnessinaction #sweet pic.twitter.com/Anrhx4Tt6R

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 24, 2020

celebrate 'no name-calling week'

It’s @GLSEN’s #NoNameCallingWeek, organized by K-12 educators and students to end name-calling and #bullying in schools. Check GLSEN’s social media to be encouraged by all the ways it’s being celebrated! ❤️💙💛 #KindnessInAction #celebratekindness #glsen #stopbullying #bekind pic.twitter.com/zLzgPSVLrL

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 23, 2020

how caring letters prevent suicide

Please take 8½ minutes to watch this inspiring video and/or read the accompanying article, and then follow @KevinHinesStory and @ursulawhiteside to see how they're fighting against stigma and suicide. #beheretomorrow #suicideprevention @NowMattersNow https://t.co/icABcYhjnr

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 22, 2020

how to not say the wrong thing

It's hard to know what to say to people when they're in the depths of something challenging! So guidelines for how to say the right thing and not say the wrong thing are useful. We all want to be that good, supportive friend in times of need. Click to read the excellent article from the Los Angeles Times.

“When you are talking to a person in a ring smaller than yours, someone closer to the center of the crisis, the goal is to help. Listening is often more helpful than talking. But if you’re going to open your mouth, ask yourself if what you are about to say is likely to provide comfort and support. If it isn’t, don’t say it. Don’t, for example, give advice. People who are suffering from trauma don’t need advice. They need comfort and support. So say, ‘I’m sorry’ or ‘This must really be hard for you’ or ‘Can I bring you a pot roast?’ Don’t say, ‘You should hear what happened to me’ or ‘Here’s what I would do if I were you.’ And don’t say, ‘This is really bringing me down.’”

An oldie but a goodie! A friend posted this today and I realized I had not shared this simple and incredibly helpful plan for communicating with people who are in the middle of #grief or #trauma. #grieftips #whatnottosay https://t.co/lfTgcNOPrh

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 21, 2020

Mario Monday: super nintendo world!

Happy #MarioMonday! Here's a great article with details and videos about #SuperNintendoWorld, coming (in a couple of years) to @UniversalORL after opening soon in Japan at @USJ_Official. #Mario #SuperMario https://t.co/kt2tILKDDo

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 20, 2020

dear mom, a song about bullying and suicide

This video from Ky Baldwin hit me HARD. Bullying wasn't the key issue in Rader's suicide, as far as we know. But it is so intense, hearing these words from the perspective of the boy and his mom. There's another video, in American Sign Language with the lyrics typed out, that you should watch next after seeing the first one.

I will go ahead and say that this video is probably going to be really hard for you to watch, no matter who you are and what you've gone through. But it's important for us to face hard truths. Suicide is real. Talking about it is important. Talk to your kids. Be involved. They'll resist sometimes, but they need you. If watching this video motivates you to action, please share with your friends any resources you see from me that you find helpful. I'm doing my best to find and shine a light on lifesaving information, and you never know who needs to hear it.

This video in #ASL also shows the lyrics to @IAmKyBaldwin’s “Dear Mom,” a song about bullying and suicide. https://t.co/L6MO6Uhk2m #stopbullying #suicideprevention #bethe1to #beafriend #beanupstander

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 19, 2020

your body is your buddy

I saw this illustration on Instagram with the following caption: “Too tall, too short, too thin, too fat, too wide ... comments like these only let me know that I’m too much for you. This is my body and it’s growing, it’s changing and I love it more each day.” It was posted by Face of Today Foundation. Their bio says, “standing for social change to end the stigmas attached to mental health.” I’m all for that! Artist is Elise Gravel. Take a look at both their accounts for more inspiration!

Ever struggle with #bodyimage? I have. An approach I find useful is to #celebrate what my body can do rather than focusing on what it looks like. I love this illustration from @EliseGravel. ❤️💙💛 #bodypositive #mentalhealth #loveyourself #selfcare pic.twitter.com/YQky6jK2M7

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 18, 2020

you start where you start

I’ve admired Mirna Valerio, a friend of a friend, for a long time. She used to live and work close to where our cabin in the mountains is. Even though she’s not there anymore, I still have hopes of meeting her for a (slow!) run someday! It’s fun and inspiring watching her star rise. If you’re not familiar with her, check her out for inspiration, body positivity, and joy on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

Listen to author and ultramarathoner @TheMirnavator lay down some #wisdom about how to get started — running or with anything — on an interview from @KellyClarksonTV this week. ❤️💙💛 #strongwomen #beautifulworkinprogress #lifelessons #youstartwhereyoustart pic.twitter.com/r3Xg75Upyg

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 17, 2020

twitter book club: building a life worth living

Twitter #BookClub! Just got my copy of @DrLinehan’s memoir. I can’t wait for the weekly discussion, starting Feb. 1 and led by @NowMattersNow’s @ursulawhiteside. There’s still time for you to get the book. #BuildingALifeWorthLiving https://t.co/oe14VBcrUG pic.twitter.com/9f0GCTOkYN

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 16, 2020

#marshalinehan #nowmattersnow #dbt #dbtskills #dialecticalbehaviortherapy #bookclub #mentalhealth #suicideprevention #survivingsuicidalthoughts #lifeworthliving 🌱 #succulent #crassulacorymbulosaredpagoda #crassulacorymbulosa 

meditation app from bronkar lee

I posted a really fun music video for Mario Monday this week. YouTuber AaronGrooves, a favorite of mine famous for his Mario on Marimba, got together with another musician, a guy named Bronkar Lee, to perform the heck out of a groovy version of the Super Mario Bros.' Underworld Theme.

I was curious: Who is this guy, Bronkar? Turns out he might be best known for a viral video of him beatboxing for his dancing baby. I looked around a little bit and found the he and Aaron have collaborated on something called Collision of Rhythm (which has a separate YouTube channel and associated social media). And then of course Bronkar has his own YouTube channel as well. I checked it out and learned that — in addition to the baby beatboxing — to my surprise, he plays a bunch of beautiful, really soothing meditation music! (There's a lot more there; you should see for yourself.)

That brings me to what I actually wanted to tell you about today: that there's a free app of Bronkar's music and guided meditations! It's called Brain Beats, and there are hours and hours of music, plus 16 guided meditations ranging from under 4 minutes up to 11 minutes. You can find the link to the app for Apple and Google at www.meditationsthatdontsuck.com. I'm enjoying his music so much, and I think you will, too!

After my #MarioMonday tweet this week, I looked up more info about super-talented musician #BronkarLee. He has a free app I love (link below) with hours and hours of gorgeous music for #focus or #relaxation, plus 16 short sessions of #guidedmeditation. https://t.co/QyCg1MpXJZ

— Rader Ward Foundation (@RaderWardFound) January 15, 2020